“I surrender all to you, withholding nothing, withholding nothing.”
I cannot remember how many times I have sang those words, but it was only
recently that I fully grasped the meaning of what I had been uttering for so
many years, without a clue of the true meaning. Had I really surrendered ALL to
God? Well I can tell you straight up, NO! It’s like I have been trusting God
with some things and well, other things I trusted myself with. The scary thing
when I look back is, I only trusted Him with the “little” things because I felt
the need to be in control over the “big” things. The most dangerous thing I’ve
ever done in my life. I know this because it showed in the fruit my decisions
bore, or rather the lack of fruit.
See I am one of those people who likes to be in control of
everything that happens in their life. I got my wake-up call in a sermon preached
this past Sunday by Ps Ray Bevan ( do yourself a favour and get some of this
mans sermons, he is on fire!) He preached on grace, the part that hit home for
me was when he said “Beloved, surrender control in that out of control
situation.” Man that was a major eye-opener for me, I realised just how I not
in control I am of my life because frankly most of the happenings are beyond me. I had claimed to be
a follower of Jesus, but was I fully, or was I kinda keeping track of His location
while I wondered off? Matt 16:24 “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him
deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.” This was a battle for me because
I was like: “But God, you want me to let
go of all that I feel is good and take up a cross? I mean I know what my cross
weighs, just to give you an idea; rejection, anger, emptiness, sadness, insecurities,
loss, betrayal and the list goes on. I
am not sure I can even lift it, can’t I just leave it here?” Then He said to me
“My yoke is easy and my burden is light” Matt 11: 28-30. It became clear to me
that if I call myself His disciple, His son, and believe to be Christ like as I
am made in His image, then surely like Jesus, I will endure hardship and all
that not so fun stuff, BUT I will also, like Jesus follow God to glory, like
Jesus I must surrender it all and withhold nothing. Clearly relying on my own
strength has done me more damage than good. “What I once held dear, I count it
all as loss”… The cross equals love. (Read Matt 16:25). Letting go and letting God in everything. This means, forgiving without confronting some people, walking away from unhealthy relationships trusting there is better up ahead, etc.
For the first time in my life I feel okay with being completely
vulnerable, because that’s exactly what surrendering encompasses. Basically
throwing down your riffle on the battlefield and allowing God to fight on your
behalf, it isn’t your battle after all, as you are His. The victory at the end
will be more glorious than the one you envisioned. “For the Son of Man will
come in the glory of His father with His angel, and then He will reward each
according to His works.” Matt16:27. I don’t know about you but I want to
receive every reward with my name on it, not just some.
So beloved, walk naked towards God, with your hands held up in surrender.
Allow Him to secure you with His belt of truth, protect you with His
breastplate of righteousness, fit your feet with peace as you walk, crown you with
His helmet of salvation, arm you with His sword of the spirit and protect you
with the shield of faith.
Be restored, be renewed and rejoice in His unfailing love.
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